At age 12, summer of 1962, I went to church camp. We had choice of “classes” to take. I chose one on economics. I remember the teacher stating that “When you educate a man, you educate a human. When you educate a woman, you educate a family.” I was an at-home mother until eldest child was entering her senior college year, and youngest her 7th grade year.(And then took off next year to home-school this child.) This situation derived from choice made before we (husband and wife) committed to each other. Id est, while we were still “just dating”.
I was a stay at home mom and actually had a friend say “think how much more you could give them if you had a job”. My response was “what do they need more than my time and guidance?” A stay at home mom is very valuable. My kids are grown now with young kids of their own, and I’ve kept two of them with me when the parents worked, plus I’m on call when anyone needs me. So I’m now a stay at home grandmother. And yes, I have a degree in Business Administration. Comes in very handy when you run a household.
I have opened my oven door since my “educated” stay at home mother taught me to…and especially after forgetting as an adult and had the same hot mess…lol…I have also taught my children the same…so far neither has had a hot mess..lol
I liked your distinction between education, learning, and training. The author Louis L’amour, for example, did not earn a college degree but I would consider him very well educated. His research taught him that many men on the western frontier (19th century) may not have gone to formalized schooling institutions but some had studied and memorized only a few classic books like Plutarch’s Lives and Blackstone, not having access to thousands of books on a kindle. I think this also illustrates the classical education pillar of ‘much, not many’, choosing quality over quantity.
Thank you for this. I didn’t know that about L’Amour. I think what you’re saying is right. Men like Louis L’Amour (Abraham Lincoln also comes to mind) were certainly well educated--though not formally. That they had access to a few classical books speaks to the rigor of classical education--even what little they had. For the purposes of my article, I had to draw some definitional lines--in my article’s formulation, I would say that L’Amour and Lincoln were “learned men,” despite very little formal education. On the other hand, in modern times we have many formally educated people--many of whom, despite their degrees, could never be called learned. Again--I appreciate your thoughtful comment.
Maureen- Teaching kids at home is one of the most difficult, challenging, rewarding, and noble tasks around. Hope you're well this week. Cheers, -Thalia
To add on to your point about the importance of education in the home, I would go further and say that "job training," as you described it, is also very important for women who plan to be stay at home mothers. Within the course of a marriage, unexpected hardships will inevitably occur. If a home maker has no sort of backup job training in the case that their husband: gets injured/sick, is arrested, dies, or even divorces and leaves, what is already a catastrophe can turn into something a lot worse (especially if children are involved). In the case that her husband is unable to provide for her family, the responsibility naturally falls on her.
There were a few points that heavily intertwine with this issue that you did not address, and I would like to know your opinion regarding them.
Here are a few questions that I would like you to consider for further commentary:
1) Do you believe that there is no higher calling for a woman than to be a mother and a home maker?
2) Do you believe all women ought to have children if possible?
3) Do you think women who have a job and have kids are worse mothers for having the job?
4) What do you think of the idea of a stay at home father?
5) If the premise that women should become homemakers is correct, do you believe that expensive, extensive, and specialized education (doctors, lawyers, PhDs) ought to be more reserved for men who will most likely spend their lifetimes in the field, rather than women who will most likely obtain the degree but won't pursue the career because maternal responsibilities?
Thank you for your note--I'm honored to have you as a reader. You raise a number of probing questions. Some of what you have raised will be fodder for future posts. But let me just address a couple of your points. I tend to agree with Edith Stein's sentiment when she said, "Each woman who lives in the light of eternity can fulfill her vocation, no matter if it is in marriage, in a religious order, or in a worldly profession." I lean heavily on the concept of vocation, of a calling for each one of us. For me, this only makes sense if I acknowledge who is at the other end of the call. I believe it is God. My take is that motherhood/homemaking is certainly a high calling among other high callings.
One thing I think is often ignored in discussions about this topic is the fact that over a woman's lifetime, she may engage the calling of homemaker, and then as circumstances change--her kids grow up, financial hardship, and so on--she may answer a different call. Both callings fulfill a purpose, and therefore both are worthy. My own mother is an example of this, and I honor her work throughout her life because it had purpose, chief among them the well-being of her family.
Thank you again for reading! I so appreciate your time.
Delightful 😊
At age 12, summer of 1962, I went to church camp. We had choice of “classes” to take. I chose one on economics. I remember the teacher stating that “When you educate a man, you educate a human. When you educate a woman, you educate a family.” I was an at-home mother until eldest child was entering her senior college year, and youngest her 7th grade year.(And then took off next year to home-school this child.) This situation derived from choice made before we (husband and wife) committed to each other. Id est, while we were still “just dating”.
I was a stay at home mom and actually had a friend say “think how much more you could give them if you had a job”. My response was “what do they need more than my time and guidance?” A stay at home mom is very valuable. My kids are grown now with young kids of their own, and I’ve kept two of them with me when the parents worked, plus I’m on call when anyone needs me. So I’m now a stay at home grandmother. And yes, I have a degree in Business Administration. Comes in very handy when you run a household.
I have opened my oven door since my “educated” stay at home mother taught me to…and especially after forgetting as an adult and had the same hot mess…lol…I have also taught my children the same…so far neither has had a hot mess..lol
I liked your distinction between education, learning, and training. The author Louis L’amour, for example, did not earn a college degree but I would consider him very well educated. His research taught him that many men on the western frontier (19th century) may not have gone to formalized schooling institutions but some had studied and memorized only a few classic books like Plutarch’s Lives and Blackstone, not having access to thousands of books on a kindle. I think this also illustrates the classical education pillar of ‘much, not many’, choosing quality over quantity.
Thank you for this. I didn’t know that about L’Amour. I think what you’re saying is right. Men like Louis L’Amour (Abraham Lincoln also comes to mind) were certainly well educated--though not formally. That they had access to a few classical books speaks to the rigor of classical education--even what little they had. For the purposes of my article, I had to draw some definitional lines--in my article’s formulation, I would say that L’Amour and Lincoln were “learned men,” despite very little formal education. On the other hand, in modern times we have many formally educated people--many of whom, despite their degrees, could never be called learned. Again--I appreciate your thoughtful comment.
Maureen- Teaching kids at home is one of the most difficult, challenging, rewarding, and noble tasks around. Hope you're well this week. Cheers, -Thalia
Thank you for this!
You’re most welcome! Thank you for reading!
Delightful 😊
Interesting post.
To add on to your point about the importance of education in the home, I would go further and say that "job training," as you described it, is also very important for women who plan to be stay at home mothers. Within the course of a marriage, unexpected hardships will inevitably occur. If a home maker has no sort of backup job training in the case that their husband: gets injured/sick, is arrested, dies, or even divorces and leaves, what is already a catastrophe can turn into something a lot worse (especially if children are involved). In the case that her husband is unable to provide for her family, the responsibility naturally falls on her.
There were a few points that heavily intertwine with this issue that you did not address, and I would like to know your opinion regarding them.
Here are a few questions that I would like you to consider for further commentary:
1) Do you believe that there is no higher calling for a woman than to be a mother and a home maker?
2) Do you believe all women ought to have children if possible?
3) Do you think women who have a job and have kids are worse mothers for having the job?
4) What do you think of the idea of a stay at home father?
5) If the premise that women should become homemakers is correct, do you believe that expensive, extensive, and specialized education (doctors, lawyers, PhDs) ought to be more reserved for men who will most likely spend their lifetimes in the field, rather than women who will most likely obtain the degree but won't pursue the career because maternal responsibilities?
Thank you for your time.
Hello Christina!
Thank you for your note--I'm honored to have you as a reader. You raise a number of probing questions. Some of what you have raised will be fodder for future posts. But let me just address a couple of your points. I tend to agree with Edith Stein's sentiment when she said, "Each woman who lives in the light of eternity can fulfill her vocation, no matter if it is in marriage, in a religious order, or in a worldly profession." I lean heavily on the concept of vocation, of a calling for each one of us. For me, this only makes sense if I acknowledge who is at the other end of the call. I believe it is God. My take is that motherhood/homemaking is certainly a high calling among other high callings.
One thing I think is often ignored in discussions about this topic is the fact that over a woman's lifetime, she may engage the calling of homemaker, and then as circumstances change--her kids grow up, financial hardship, and so on--she may answer a different call. Both callings fulfill a purpose, and therefore both are worthy. My own mother is an example of this, and I honor her work throughout her life because it had purpose, chief among them the well-being of her family.
Thank you again for reading! I so appreciate your time.